8/31/2019

And how can I help?

(said as a greeting. It’s a refurbished quote from Sherlock Holmes(Jonny Lee Miller) said in episode 7.13 ‘Their Last Bow’ from crime tv show ‘Elementary(2019)’. According to Amazon Video, that scene is located 8 minutes and 4 seconds into the episode.)

I don’t want to leave the greeting ‘And how can I help?’ too soon. Since I seem to be dependent on watching the last episode of ‘Elementary’, I’ll interpret that dependency as an indication that I should keep that greeting for a little while longer.

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It is now 11:26 AM EST for me. I think I started around 10:00 AM looking for a new music video. I thought I chose one earlier, but then I changed my mind and continued looking. Finally, I chose the music video for song ‘Dancing With Nobody’ by Austin Mahone. The reason I chose music video ‘Dancing With Nobody’ is based on using ideas I will give you in this list, and in the next list for idea ‘Resist’. I know I said I would explain idea ‘Resist’ in this list, but yesterday I realized that you should get a few more other ideas before I explained idea ‘Resist’ to you. You see, the idea associated with idea ‘Resist’ is a new idea, something that I believe many of you would choose to use. That’s why I decided to give you a few more ideas before explaining idea ‘Resist’ to you. Once you have the ideas in this list, and the ideas from the next list, I would be able to explain to you the use of music video ‘Dancing With Nobody’ by Austin Mahone. I do have an explanation I can give you now about music video ‘Dancing With Nobody’, but you may not like it. If you choose to read this list and the next list, the reason to watch music video ‘Dancing With Nobody’ would be more standard demographic. But for now, here’s the explanation to watch music video ‘Dancing With Nobody: if you choose to look up the word ‘millionaire’ in www.wikipedia.org, according to that article, America has the most adult millionaires in the world, 41% of the world total. China has 8%, and Japan has 7%. So, in my opinion, that means that if you have that many rich people in America, what will happen in America is that the ambiance associated with all of that money will also be made more obvious. For example, if you live in America, let’s say you’re used to believing that your neighborhood’s ambiance feels like a normal middle class neighborhood. All of a sudden, when they’re? ready, the ambiance of your neighborhood will change from normal middle class, to upper class. When the change of you’re neighborhood’s ambiance occurs, it will happen very quickly. And that is why I recommend you watch music video ‘Dancing With Nobody’ by Austin Mahone. If you choose to watch that music video, when your neighborhood changes, in my opinion, a lot of the younger people in your neighborhood will look like how the singer Austin Mahone portrays himself in that music video. Anyway, that is just my opinion.

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Here’s a quote about the song and music video for ‘Dancing With Nobody’ from soundigest.com:

‘ This new single is the perfect upbeat song with a groovy rhythm that’s sure to get you on your feet. It’s an infectious beat, giving off a hint of ’70s vibes, along with a modern beat of drums, guitars and his effortless falsettos. ‘

‘ To go along with the single, the “Dirty Work” singer released a fun-yet-simple, feel-good music video by director Trent Barboza. It follows… around Venice Beach, along with a few clips of him and his love interest. ‘

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And here’s a quote from the lyrics of song ‘Dancing With Nobody’:

I don’t feel like dancing with nobody else
It don’t feel romantic with nobody else (No, no, no, no)
Can’t you see that, baby
I don’t want nobody else but you

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I found the music video in www.youtube.com, category ‘New Songs of the Week – June 29, 2019’ published by ‘TopMusicMafia’. It gives you a preview of a collection of music videos. I don’t think they’re rated. It’s just a collection. The preview of music video ‘Dancing With Nobody’ starts 1 minute and 55 seconds into that collection.

To watch music video ‘Dancing With Nobody’ for free, search for phrase ‘dancing with nobody’ in www.youtube.com, and it should be one of the 1st selections offered, with over 1 million views. It premiered June 19, 2019, less than 2 months ago.

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Not need validation and reciprocation from others to do certain things:

Although there’s bad language in the illustration, the best reference I can think of for idea ‘Not need validation and reciprocation from others to do certain things’ is in the movie ‘A Bronx Tale(1993)’, starring Lillo Brancato as Calogero Anello, Chazz Palminteri as Sonny LoSpecchio, and Eddie Montanaro as Eddie Mush. The movie is available from Amazon.com as a streaming rental for about 4 dollars, or as a streaming purchase for about 6 dollars. With the bad language removed, the illustration according to Amazon Video starts 46 minutes and 34 seconds into the movie. The scene starts in Aqueduct Racetrack, C(Calogero) verifying to the others that he made a bet on a horse called Kryptonite to win. Here is the quote:

Sonny LoSpecchio: ‘C, come here! You get it in?’

C: ‘Yeah, I got it in, Sonny, it’s all on Kryptonite.’

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Sonny LoSpecchio: ‘Beautiful… You hold them.’

47 minutes into the movie, it looks like the horse Kryptonite will win the race:

Sonny LoSpecchio: ‘Look at him. Forget it. It’s over.’

Sonny LoSpecchio is congratulating the others, believing that the horse won the race before the race is over. However, 47 minutes and 14 seconds into the movie, they noticed that Eddie Mush also made a bet on Kryptonite to win. That is when Sonny and the others believed that the horse that they bet on, Kryptonite, would lose, because they believed that their friend Eddie Mush is a jinx(a person supposed to bring bad luck), they left before the race was over, knowing that the horse would lose. C(Calogero), however, stayed, still believing that the horse Kryptonite could still win the race. When the horse Kryptonite lost, C blamed his misfortune on Eddie Mush, and then left.

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It is my belief that we do many things that rely on the validations and reciprocations of others. For example, when people work with each other in their jobs in general, the people rely on each other’s validations and reciprocations. I also believe that it’s a good idea to be able to do certain reasonable things without needing validation and reciprocation from others. Refurbished for advice, in the ‘A Bronx Tale’ example, C continued to participate with the possibility that the horse Kryptonite would win the race, but that participation needed the validation and reciprocation that the horse Kryptonite would indeed win the race. And when that horse did not win that race, C chose to no longer continue that participation. He even blamed Eddie Mush for the horse losing the race, since even his boss believes that Eddie Mush is a jinx.

So, here is my recommendation to you: if you think that such an ability is useful for you to develop, can you choose to do something reasonable, something simple for example, without needing validation and reciprocation from others? Going back to the ‘A Bronx Tale’ reference, I’m not recommending that you watch the movie, but Eddie Mush is friends with everyone in that group, but C does not have that same friendship expectation with Eddie Mush. I think that’s because Eddie Mush and the others are old friends, and according to www.imdb.com, C is depicted to be just 17 years old. C doesn’t have that ‘old friendship’ that Eddie Mush has with the others. So, even though the older men believe that Eddie Mush is a jinx, they also believe that Eddie Mush is their friend, and that friendship requires no extra validation or reciprocation. C, however, does not have that type of ‘old friendship’, causing C to discontinue with his participation with the bet with the horse Kryptonite using a more emotional emphasis.

It is my belief that there are jobs out there in America, such as doctors and lawyers, that do it all of the time, that they continue to do things even though they are not getting a certain validation and reciprocation from others. For example, since Americans are entitled to have lawyers represent them, that means that, if no plea bargain was made to avoid trial, then there is usually one lawyer opposing another lawyer, one lawyer representing a client even without certain validations and reciprocations from the opposing lawyer. A typical ‘The Good Wife’ episode starring Julianna Margulies as Alicia Florrick should show that.

Another example is a patient who notices some sort of body pain informs a doctor, and the doctor identifies the body pain as an indication of another, underlying problem, and so to treat the body pain, the underlying problem is also treated. In that situation, the patient at first may not feel like the body pain is getting the obvious validation and reciprocation it deserves. That is because the doctor is still trying to explain to the patient that the underlying problems have to also be treated. It’s just a delayed misunderstanding.

Even though I believe there are jobs that allow people to routinely do things without needing a certain validation and reciprocation from others, most of us probably could benefit from the development of such an ability. Here’s an example: I know that this is ‘just advice’ that I am offering to you, and there are no commitments. Let’s say that you recommend to someone else to read this blog. Soon after, that person makes a request from you, a request for more validation and reciprocation to allow that person to find this advice useful. Now, let’s say you have some difficulty trying to offer that person such validation and reciprocation. That moment may cause some people to think about dismissing the use of such advice. You see? If you have a developed sense to use this advice, that you have already decided that this advice is useful to you, in the context that does not require validation and reciprocation from others, then even if you find it difficult to give validation and reciprocation to others, you still have a more secure sense to continue using this blog. This waning effect I believe affects various types of people in general, whether you are a kid, teenager, or an adult.

All right. Here is an idea I invented yesterday while I was in the laundromat that is relevant enough for this advice. I imagined that I asked an attractive lady that I met in a public area if I can go on a date with her. Since I am single with no kids and no relationship commitments, I am assuming that it is possible that she may want to go on a date with me, maybe even have a relationship with me. Her reply was unusually demanding for me. She wanted me to meet a certain expectation, let’s say I had to be rich, in order to date her. Now, since this is just an imagined story, I imagined that her reply revealed to me an underlying(implicit; discoverable only by close scrutiny or analysis) problem that she has. I thought to myself that I can help her with this underlying problem that she has. However, even though she may be grateful that I helped her with that problem, she still won’t date me or be in a relationship with me, since I am not rich.

To help you find more useful that ‘underlying problem’ story I imagined in the laundromat, I recommend a scene in episode 4.3 ‘Tag, You’re Me’ from crime tv show ‘Elementary(2015)’. This is one? of the episodes where Sherlock(Jonny Lee Miller) and his father Morland(John Noble) are working together to resolve one of Morland’s business ventures. In that scene, they are both talking to Liliane Bellerose(Shohreh Aghdashloo). The episode is available streaming for about 2 dollars Standard Definition from Amazon.com, and according to Amazon Video, that scene starts 29 minutes and 28 seconds into the episode. Here is the quote:

Morland: ‘The habitat also occupies part of the space intended for the wind farm. When my clients conduct their environmental study, they will discover the monkeys’ habitat as well. And it’s extension into your property.’

Liliane Bellerose: ‘What is it you want?’

Morland: ‘I want nothing. In fact, I’m here to offer you a favor. My client… will publish this press release in an hour. It’s a pledge to revise their plans for the wind farm in order to protect the black crowned squirrel monkey. Of course, once word of the habitat gets out, that will the end of your resort and an embarrassment to you. But if you wish, I could persuade my client to let you add your name to the release, make the same pledge. You can be heroes together. The decision is yours.

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[Instead of adding another idea to this list, I’m going to finish this list today. I’m going to add the disclaimer, and close it. Since I’ve decided to not work on Labor Day, 9/2/2019, I’ve decided to explain another idea that day. That idea is not idea ‘Resist’, but another idea I thought I would explain today. For now, that idea is called ‘Intentional bias’. After that, I plan to explain idea ‘Resist’. From now on, instead of telling you that I will proofread an idea I have not proofread yet, instead I will say that I am just going to add the disclaimer and close the idea. I have discovered that it takes a great deal of time to proofread these ideas. To me, ‘proofread’ means to read over the ideas in order to fix any mistakes. I’ve been at this for several years now. I am not saying that I am beyond proofreading, that I don’t have to proofread. I am saying that it would be more realistic of me to be able to give you the ideas as a priority, and proofreading to me is no longer as important as it once was. For Wishlist #1182, #1183, #1184, and #1185, that is what I did. I added the disclaimers to those lists to close them. I did not proofread them.

So, if you are there this coming Monday, I’ll see you then.

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Rated R violence and viewer discretion for movie ‘A Bronx Tale’. TV-14 crime violence and viewer discretion for tv show ‘Elementary’. Use only refurbished for advice references recommended. Throw away rest of episode, series, and movie. [Use mental bookmark ‘Not need validation and reciprocation from others/(other people) to do certain things’ for reference, allocation, and prevention when needed.